If You're Not the One
by Shae Elven Heart
Summary: Slash. ZigSquid. Zigzag likes Squid more than a friend, but does Squid feel the same way?
1. Only in a towel? Oh boy

Hello! I'm Shae! And I am myself! Lol, sorry I went to this weekend camp thing and the dude's like "You are no one but yourself. Refer to yourself as myself." And of course wisecracks (namely me) had to say "You mean I have to call myself Phillip?" cuz the guy's name was Phillip, lol. Anyways, yay for the slashness! I had read Merry/Pippin slash in the LOTR section and I was like "Aww! Cute hobbitses!" And now I get to WRITE my OWN slash fic! WHOOOO!! Um . . . I hope I don't freak you out or anything, cuz I sure freaked out my friend Joe when he read this, lol. So this is in Ziggy's POV as you can see (I'm being obvious today). Yep.  
  
*The lone cricket in Shae's kitchen chirps*  
  
e_e;;;  
  
Important note: If you DO NOT like or feel comfortable with slash (aka guy/guy) fics, I recommend you not read this. I think Joe is still rinsing his eyes out with dish detergent to try to forget what he read. Now he's screaming in pain as I write this. I recommend not using his method. It is painful.  
  
~*~  
  
The morning trumpet sounded and Zigzag yawned and sat up in his cot. The others around him were stirring also. He looked around and his eyes fell upon Squid, who had groaned groggily at the sound of the trumpet and threw his pillow onto his head. Zigzag smiled and strode up to the side of Squid's bed and snatched the pillow from his grasp. He ruffled Squid's hair.  
  
"Wake up, Sleeping Beauty!" Zigzag said in a joking voice. In truth, Zigzag really did think Squid looked beautiful when he was sleeping. It was almost the only time his chocolate brown hair was revealed for the world to see without being covered by his hat and du-rag. Zigzag sometimes stayed up just to watch him sleeping. He looked so young, so innocent and peaceful. He wished that he could just run his fingers through that hair and look into those beautiful brown eyes, but knew that he never could. He knew Squid didn't feel the same way. If Squid ever found out, he was sure he would look at him, disgusted, and would never want to see him again. He knew all this, but he still felt blissful whenever he laid eyes on Squid.  
  
"Eegghh." Squid said blearily, turning over on his cot. Zigzag began unmercifully ruffling Squid's hair. Squid swatted at Zig's hand and sat up. "Okay, I'm up!" He said grumpily, glaring at him. The boys headed out of the tent, chatting randomly.  
  
~*~  
  
As they were heading out on the lakebed, D-tent's conversation had suddenly turned to cars.  
  
"Man, I wish I had a Camer-o or something so I wouldn't have to walk." Armpit said. The others laughed.  
  
"It's Camaro, dude." Magnet said, snickering.  
  
"I'd like to have one of those big sporty cars." Squid said.  
  
"Yeah, and they would have those flame patterns on them." Zigzag said. Squid smiled and grasped Zigzag's hand in what was between a high-five and a handshake.  
  
"That would be tight, man." Squid said. The other boys then began talking about what their dream cars were as Zigzag gazed dreamily into space and vowed himself to never wash his hand again.  
  
~*~  
  
If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?  
  
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?  
  
If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call?  
  
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all?  
  
~*~  
  
Zigzag walked into D-tent, exhausted. Everyone was already in the Wreck Room, but Zig felt too exhausted to hang out there. He sighed and collapsed onto his cot, closing his eyes.  
  
"You okay, Zig?" A voice said. Zig looked up to see Squid standing over him, clothed in nothing but a towel. Zig's eyes went big. He was almost struck dumb at the sight of Squid with a bare chest and wet hair.  
  
"Um . . . um . . . I . . . I . . . I . . . " Zigzag said, trying to think of what to say. Squid looked somewhat worried.  
  
"Are you gonna be sick or something?" He asked.  
  
"I . . . I . . . I'm . . . I-I'm . . . o-okay." Zigzag stuttered. Squid raised an eyebrow and then grinned.  
  
"What happened, Ziggy? Did you see a yellow-spotted lizard?" Squid asked. Zigzag's eyes widened even more, if that was even possible.  
  
"Y-y-y-y-yellow . . . Y-y-y-y-yellow . . . no." Zigzag said. Squid laughed and Zigzag smiled a little. Squid then turned around and got into his boxers while keeping his towel on. Zig took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Squid turned around and saw Zig like that.  
  
"Are you sure you're okay?" Squid asked. When Squid had spoken, Zigzag had opened his eyes in a flash and fell off his cot, startled. Squid blinked. Zigzag forced a grin.  
  
"U-u-um . . . oops. S-sorry." He said almost nervously. He got up and hurried out of the tent.  
  
"Hey Zig! Where're you going?" Squid asked, leaning out of the tent.  
  
"Dinner!" Zig said. Squid fell silent and looked after Zigzag silently. Something weird was going on with him-dinner was an hour ago.  
  
~*~  
  
I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand,  
  
If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?  
  
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?  
  
~*~  
  
Must work out what happens next! *puts on thinking cap* OH! BTW, the song is "If you're not the one" bye Daniel Bedingfield. Hence the title! And hence my inspiration to write this fic even though one verse doesn't apply to the situation! I dunno . . . I might change the rating to R if anything on the romance novel part of my brain pops up. Yes, I read certain romance novels. I think they're pretty!  
  
Eddie: Maybe that's why you think I'm looking at your It.  
  
AHA! YOU ARE! EWWW! LOOK AWAY!  
  
Eddie: I'm looking at the BACK of your CHAIR!  
  
*Growls* MY BOOTY! You can't have it!  
  
Lol, well, see ya!  
  
~Shae~ 


	2. Pillowfights and tears

Sniffling noises sounded in D-tent. Zigzag opened his eyes and looked around for the maker of the sound. He looked towards Squid and saw him with the blanket over his eyes, shaking a little.  
  
"Squid?" Zigzag whispered. Squid jumped a little and then froze as if pretending to be asleep. "Squid." Squid turned his head.  
  
"What? I'm tryin' to sleep!" He said. He must've thought that the darkness would hide his tears, but Zigzag definitely saw the moisture on Squid's face.  
  
"What's wrong, Squid?" Zigzag asked, concerned.  
  
"Leave me alone." Squid rolled over, his back to Zigzag.  
  
"Sorry." Zigzag said quietly, looking down. Squid didn't say anything else, so Zig assumed that he had fallen asleep. He lay on his bed for a moment, staring at Squid's soft chocolate brown locks, eventually falling asleep himself.  
  
When morning came, everyone went through their normal routine of waking up except Squid, who was on his stomach with his pillow clutched over his head. Everyone else had already gone outside except for Caveman and Zero. Zigzag went up to Squid and nudged him gently. He grunted but didn't move. Zig then attempted to lift the pillow off of him, but he clung to it like a lifeline.  
  
"Squiddy! Get up!" Zig said, pulling harder on the pillow. Without warning, Squid hopped up on his knees and then whapped Ziggy right in the face with the pillow.  
  
"Alright, I'm up n-" Squid started to say, but Zigzag had grabbed a pillow off the nearest cot and whapped Squid back. They laughed and started to get into a full-fledged pillow fight when Mr. Pendanski came in and blew his whistle. Squid and Ziggy froze.  
  
"Stop acting like sissy girls and get out there!" Pendanski said. The boys walked out of the tent, and when they were far enough away from Mom, they busted into laughter.  
  
~*~  
  
Later on that day after everyone was finished digging, Zigzag looked up from his blank television screen and looked over to the pool table where a ruckus seemed to be forming. He stood up and immediately saw what was happening since he could see over almost everyone's head. A boy from tent C was taunting Squid and laughing. Zigzag noticed that the boy was holding what appeared to be a toy octopus and that he was now making it dance above Squid's head as Squid tried to grab for it. Zigzag made his way over.  
  
"C'mon, little Squiddy, come get your lil friend!" The C-tent boy was saying.  
  
"Give it to me." Squid said deeply, his face as red as a tomato. "Hand it over now, or I'm going to kill you."  
  
"C'mon, little Alan, you have to jump for it first!" the boy yelled, laughing. Zigzag knew that Squid hated it when another boy called him by his real name. Zigzag stepped up, glaring at the boy.  
  
"That's Squid's. Give it back to him." Zig said. The boy just laughed. Zig's eyes flashed and he grabbed the boy tightly by his collar. X-ray came up.  
  
"Hey, why you be squabblin' up in here?" X said. Zigzag ignored up and kept his grasp tightly on the boy's collar. He was squirming and his face was starting to turn a light purple. The octopus dropped out of his hands. Squid picked it up and stared at Zigzag in horror.  
  
"Zigzag, stop it!" X-ray said, trying to break his grip, but failing. Armpit eventually had to plow between them to break them up. Zigzag fell against the wall, panting. The C-tent boy got up and gently massaged his throat and then pointed at Zigzag.  
  
"Stay away from me, you fag!" And with that he turned on his heel and left. Zigzag got up feeling somewhat dazed. He looked around for Squid, but he wasn't there. Zigzag left.  
  
~*~  
  
Squid sat on his cot staring silently at the toy octopus. He heard rustling a few minutes later and Zigzag came through the tent flap. Squid kept his eyes down, even when Zigzag came to stand in front of him.  
  
"Are you okay, Squid?" Zigzag asked quietly. Squid didn't answer. He kept thinking of the look that had been in Zigzag's eyes just before he started choking the other boy. His mother had had the same look in her eyes when she would beat him. Then, to Squid's horror, a tear splashed onto his arm. He was crying. He tried to hide it, but evidently, Zigzag noticed. He sat next to Squid and put a hand on his shoulder. Squid froze, but didn't shrug off Zig's hand.  
  
"I-I need t-t-t-to be a-alone." Squid said through his tears. He was thoroughly embarrassed that one of his friends was witnessing him cry. Zigzag didn't leave.  
  
"I could never leave you alone like this, Squid." Zigzag whispered softly. After that statement, Zigzag took Squid into his arms and held him there, letting him cry into his shoulder until he could cry no more.  
  
~*~  
  
Okay, I updated, so please don't sic your little barking Chihuahua on me. O_o; Oh, and BTW, I AM thinking of changing it to R, but not too soon.  
  
~Shae~ 


	3. Pain, Confusion, What you have to live w...

Squid wiped his eyes on something and then realized that it was Zigzag's sleeve. He immediately turned red and was about to open his mouth to apologize for sobbing all over Zigzag, but something stopped him from opening his mouth at all. He realized that his face was a mere few inches away from Zigzag's. He cleared his throat and stood up so that he was no longer in that awkward position.  
  
"Are you okay now?" Zigzag asked quietly. Squid shrugged.  
  
"Yeah, but you better not tell anyone." Squid warned.  
  
"Don't worry, I won't." Zigzag said in the same quiet voice. It was starting to freak Squid out, but he still couldn't stop a warm sort of chill from running up his spine. Squid turned to go back outside, but Zigzag spoke up again.  
  
"Don't you want this?" He said, gesturing to Squid's toy octopus. Squid hesitated and then walked back over to the cot. He felt Zigzag watching him the whole time as he neared the spot next to him. He reached for the octopus, and for a brief moment, their lips brushed as Squid bent over to pick it up. Squid quickly straightened up quickly, shocked at the sudden contact. So shocked, in fact that he fell over backwards. He got up quickly and looked at Zigzag with wide eyes. Zigzag looked somewhat hurt at his reaction. The two boys stared at each other for a bit until Squid abruptly turned and raced out of the tent. Zigzag sat staring at the tent flap for a long time until finally laying down in his own cot and going to sleep.  
  
He woke up in the middle of the night and looked towards Squid's cot. Squid was lying awake, glaring up at the canvas ceiling. Zigzag didn't know either to speak or not, but he felt crushed that the "lip brushing" had scared Squid away. He felt like an idiot.  
  
Squid just lay there in his cot, staring up at the canvas ceiling and thinking. He thought back on what had happened earlier. He didn't feel like himself anymore. He felt . . . indescribable.  
  
"Damn." He muttered, rolling over in his cot and getting a surprise of seeing a pair of eyes staring at him through the darkness. "Don't you ever sleep?" Zigzag said nothing, for he was afraid that if he opened his mouth, his heart would make him pour out all at once what he felt.  
  
So for a whole five minutes they sat in silence, neither of them moving or saying a word. Zigzag rolled over, his back to Squid, and buried his head in his pillow. He couldn't take it anymore. Squid would never have him. He was just the most perfect thing in this world that Zigzag could ever wish for, but of course, could never have. He pulled his covers over his head and closed his eyes to an anguished sleep.  
  
Meanwhile, Squid looked at Zigzag the moment the other boy turned away and wondered what how he could make him feel the way he did. He exhaled furiously through his nostrils. How dare he make him feel so . . . so strange. Squid closed his eyes and willed himself to stop thinking about that matter, but it was all that filled his mind. Giving up, he drifted into a rough sleep.  
  
~*~  
  
In the morning, Zig and Squid looked . . . well . . . like heck. From the way they had slept that night, they both had matching hairdos: sticking straight up in every direction. Squid slapped on his du-rag and cap, causing Zigzag to stare at the beautiful brown locks that were half-hidden underneath it all. He then mentally slapped himself, knowing that he was just hurting himself by merely thinking of Squid. He walked outside, preparing to face another blistering hot day.  
  
He felt his pain.  
  
He'd just have to live with it.  
  
~*~  
  
Okay, I've decided that the next chapter might be R. Might. As in maybe, or maybe not. If not, then the chapter after that.  
  
~Shae~ 


	4. Confessions and feelings

Yay, so I changed the rating to R finally for some of y'all! Um . . . this get sorta heated in this chapter because when you put an R rating and the romance novel part of my mind together . . . it results in this story! MWAHA!! Enjoy.  
  
Warning: If ya don't like . . . erm, intimate physical contact, it's suggested you don't read. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!  
  
~*~  
  
Squid wiped sweat from his brow and looked around. Half the gang had finished digging except for him, Caveman, Armpit, and Zigzag. He took his measurements and then climbed out. Half a second later, Zigzag did the same thing. They stared at each other awkwardly and then walked towards camp in blank silence. Squid walked into D-tent and paused when he saw that it was empty. He went over to his cot and prayed that-then he heard the tent flap. He stood there facing his cot as he felt Zigzag's presence. Zigzag's arm had accidentally brushed against him and he felt a warm shiver run up his spine. He absolutely froze. What had just happened?  
  
"Are . . . are you okay, Squid?" Zigzag asked quietly. Squid looked at him, wide-eyed. Zigzag's gaze softened, but he turned away. It was quiet for a considerable amount of time until it was broken by Zigzag plopping onto his cot face first. Squid looked at him, alarmed, thinking that he had collapsed from heatstroke or something, but then Zigzag rolled over and sighed, muttering under his breath "Life is cruel."  
  
"What do you mean?" Squid asked somewhat timidly. He knew how he felt, but he didn't have a word for it. Whenever Zigzag was near he felt as if he would if something exciting was about to happen, a rush of some sort. His whole body felt it, so much that it scared him.  
  
"Ever since I was little, life failed to grant me anything I wanted." Zigzag said. He absentmindedly twirled his hair around his fingers as he stared up at the ceiling. He wore a terribly pained expression and he avoided looking at Squid. Actually, both of them were looking in opposite directions of each other.  
  
"What do you mean?" Zigzag shifted a little.  
  
"I . . . " Zigzag said his voice husky. He stopped and just hid his head under his blankets. Nothing more was said.  
  
~*~  
  
Squid had gone to clean up and then returned again, though he entered the tent slowly and silently. Zigzag was sitting on his cot and looked up. When he saw Squid he immediately looked down again, for Squid was in lack of a shirt and was wearing only boxers. There was again silence as Squid searched for a shirt in his crate and then put it on. After he put on his jumpsuit and tied the arms around the waist, he turned and just about jumped ten feet in the air when he saw that Zigzag had gotten up and was standing about two feet away, watching him. His breath caught in his chest and his heart skipped a few beats. He gazed at Zigzag's green eyes and couldn't seem to stop staring. They were so . . . mystical. It was like two orbs of green hue. He saw in those eyes a powerful emotion that he'd never seen before in anyone's eyes . . . but it wasn't intimidating. The gaze held him there and made him realize things . . . and they felt so true. Zigzag opened his mouth to speak, and Squid's gaze lowered to his lips, watching every movement that they made.  
  
"I have to tell you this, Squid. I don't know how you'll react . . . but it's okay if you don't feel the same." Zigzag took a breath. It was now or never. If he held it in any longer, he would explode. "Your eyes are like a mix between honey and chocolate. Every time you laugh, it's like all the troubles in the world are gone. When you're feeling down, the whole world ends. When you speak, you say a lot of great thoughts that really show how wonderful you are. I . . . I sometimes want to cry because you don't feel the same way. I really care for you . . . so much that it's all I think about. Not in a stalking way, though. I never meant to feel this way, it just happened, so try not to hate me. But if you do, I'll understand."  
  
A silence followed these words. Zigzag gazed at Squid and saw that he was staring at him with a mixed expression. He looked down. "He's never going to speak to me again." Zig thought to himself. He felt a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"You're the first person in my entire life to say that." Squid said. Zigzag slowly looked up and met his gaze with Squid's. His eyes showed no expression of anger or fear, but warmth and compassion. "And . . . when I first came here, you were the one that showed me around and stuff. You've always been looking after me . . . "  
  
Then came the silence.  
  
Zig took the hand that was on his shoulder and held it gently between his own. He nodded and then said "But what about you, Squid? How do you feel?" Squid sighed.  
  
"I feel a lot of things. When I'm near you . . . it's like something exciting is going to happen. You make me feel . . . well, I don't know what . . . " Squid said, all the while staring at the ground. Zigzag gently placed his hand on Squid's cheek. Squid closed his eyes and sighed softly. Zig looked at him curiously while stroking his cheek gently. Heaven. Suddenly Squid's eyes snapped open and he stopped the motion of Zig's hand.  
  
"Are . . . " He panted "Are you sure this is right?"  
  
"If you feel that it's right . . . but if you don't-"  
  
"I-um--how . . . don't stop." Squid said. Zigzag raised an eyebrow and tried to avoid grinning.  
  
"What was that?" Zig asked. Squid placed Zig's hand on his cheek where it had been a few seconds ago.  
  
"Please . . . " Squid whispered. Zig bit his lip a bit and then stroke Squid's cheek like he had before. Squid groaned and then slowly closed the gap between them and hugged Zig to him.  
  
"Now where's my thank you?" Zig asked, grinning playfully.  
  
Squid closed the gap even more as he brought their lips together in a gentle kiss. Zig closed his eyes in bliss and couldn't believe that they were finally together like this. He groaned into the kiss and unconsciously moved his hips slowly against Squid, who whimpered at the contact. All their thoughts seemed to go away as they continued the sweet rhythm of their hips . . .  
  
. . . and they were soon lost in sheer bliss . . .  
  
~*~  
  
*Watches as Joe has a heart attack over the last paragraph* Um . . . wow.  
  
Hope you liked the chappy! *coughcoughGIGGLEcoughcough* and now that it's R, more fun, lol!  
  
~Shae~ 


	5. Couldn't ask for more

Zigzag sighed and softly ran his fingers through Squid's hair, more content than he had ever been in his whole life. He watched Squid as he caught his breath, his head resting against Zig's bare chest.  
  
"God, I love you, Zig." Squid said, his voice somewhat unstable due to what they had been doing a few moments before.  
  
"I love you, too, Squidly." Zigzag said, kissing him lightly on his forehead. God, he was so beautiful. They stayed that way for a moment, just lying there with one another until the tent flap rustled. Squid's head whipped around. No one was there. He got up, put on his boxers, and peered outside. No one was there.  
  
"What was that?" Zig asked, still lying on the cot.  
  
"Nothing." Squid said, and he cast a last glance around before going back into the tent. Something bore down upon him and he soon found himself pinned down on his cot. Ziggy grinned down at him.  
  
"Again?" He asked.  
  
"Hell yeah." Squid said, throwing the covers over them.  
  
(A/N: Uh . . . Cue the BIIIIIIIIIG censored sign right about now. O_o;;)  
  
~*~  
  
Squid lay awake in his cot staring up at the canvas ceiling. It had been an hour since the rest of D-tent had came into the tent, and lucky, Squid and Ziggy had managed to wrap it up by then. He sighed softly and looked over at Zig's sleeping form a few cots away. He looked like a god, so beautiful and angelic. Squid smiled. He loved him, and Zig loved him back.  
  
"I couldn't ask for more." He spoke into the darkness.  
  
It was perfect. Perfect when he looked into his lover's eyes. Perfect when he felt the words "I love you," come from his lips freely. Perfect that someone LOVED him. Perfect that what they shared hadn't been found out yet, else there would be an estrangement amongst D-tent. But, thankfully, no one knew.  
  
Or so he thought . . .  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
*GASP!* SOMEONE KNOWS! Who told 'em?! RI! Did you tell 'em??  
  
Ri: *Looks mortally offended* Why would I care about the goings on of two love-struck teenage boys?  
  
O_O;; Ok, everyone . . . Ri just said something remotely intelligent . . . GET THE CAMERA!  
  
Anyways, Me gotsta go now . . . SUPERBOWL SUNDAY! YAAAAAAAAH!! Um . . . Joe will be rooting for the Panthers and I'll just be there for the free munchies.  
  
~Shae~ 


	6. The secret holder

Zero lay still in his cot that night, nervous if either Squid or Zigzag moved even a centimeter in their sleep. When he had walked into the tent that evening, he hadn't expected to see Squid and Zigzag's naked butts . . . and other things. He shook the thoughts from his mind. This was so confusing, even though it had nothing to do with him. Half of him wanted to laugh (he didn't know why), but half of him wanted to scream about the obscenity of it all. At his age, he didn't even know boys could DO that sort of thing with each other.  
  
Squid groaned in his sleep, causing Zero to jump half an inch.  
  
"Ziggy . . . mmftphmerrr . . . "Squid mumbled, pawing the air.  
  
*What the hell?* Zero thought, blinking at Squid's movements. He knew that Squid sometimes cried in his sleep, but acting like a dog? . . . He didn't even wanna know.  
  
~*~  
  
The next day, Zero couldn't even look anyone in the eye. Not after what he saw. It was just . . . ludicrous. He took a deep breath to calm himself down.  
  
*Maybe . . . maybe being stuck in a camp of all guys gets to ya once the hormones kick in.* He thought. He froze. What if that happened to him?  
  
"Agh! Stop thinking about it!" He yelled suddenly, causing everyone around him to jump and then stare wide-eyed at him.  
  
"Are you okay, Zero?" Caveman asked. Zero just nodded. Things were getting WAY weird around here. 


End file.
